Sunday, April 26, 2015

When You Fuck Shit Up.......

.....own that shit. Admit it. Apologize for it. Move on.

And don't ..... and I mean DO NOT..... do it again.

I have said before that I don't do married. I've been down that road in the past and there's just no good that EVER comes of it. Even if the relationship disintegrates and the person you're cheating with ends up free, you'll never end up together. And why? Number one, because if he/she will do it with you, they will do it to you.

And second, part of the attraction, part of the desire, is the danger of getting caught....and when there's no more danger, it's just not quite as exciting.

I've been in all three variables of that particular equation. I've been the one who cheated. I've been the other woman. And I've been the one cheated on.

And that's a pain like nothing that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. And I promised myself it would never happen again.

And yet, here I am, guilty of inflicting that pain once again. And I don't know exactly how it happened. He wore me down, I guess. And after a while, just talking and texting and teasing each other incessantly about it wasn't enough and lines were crossed......and then blurred.....and then I talked myself into the rationale that I was actually doing her a favor. Because if I allowed him to take his frustrations out on me, he wasn't taking them out on her. Or several unsuspecting and perfectly innocent doors and walls. He could come over and vent and smoke and calm the fuck down and I would send him back to her, having pointed out just how much of a tool he was being, and they would talk and make up and go happily along their way for a while. Public Service Infidelity.

But that's complete and total Grade A Number 1 bullshit.

I was wrong. And you're absolutely right. You DO NOT FUCK another woman's husband. You just don't. No matter what kind of bullshit story he feeds you. It takes two to cheat. We both hurt you. We both lied to you. And for my part in that, I sincerely and from the bottom of my heart, apologize to you. I'm sorry. I promise I will not initiate any further contact. You asked me to delete his number from my phone and I won't do that. And that's only because if he decides to contact me, I want to know it's him.

I hope the two of you can work things out. I wish nothing but the best for you both.